Your Type
You want closeness but fear being hurt; you push people away while craving them to stay, often confusing even yourself about what you're doing. This "extreme push-and-pull of drawing close and pushing away" actually masks your deep trauma and fear that "love and hurt are inseparable"; you fear that the person who loves you will ultimately hurt you, so you use "creating chaos and testing boundaries" to see if they will really leave. But repetitive push-and-pull often ends up actually pushing the person you love away. Try hitting the brakes in your mind next time you want to push them away, and say, "I'm really confused right now; please just hold me and don't ask anything"; when you learn to not turn fear into an attack, you can truly settle down in love.
💡 Did you know?
Disorganized attachment (affecting ~5-10% of people) typically traces to caregivers who were simultaneously threatening, causing the brain to activate both approach and flee neural circuits at once.
PsyPals · psypals.com